Yesterday I had a decent evening meditation. I went upstairs to my room and the moment I had installed myself and I picked up my phone in order to start an email arrived saying Fred Davis has just uploaded a video. I saw it was a guided meditation and I decided to just follow the suggestion and started it. It was a fine meditation and it put me in a pleasant state where I was more or less aware of the Observer. I remained seated like that for 30 more minutes.
After the meditation it was midnight but I wasn’t tired at all and I knew that going to bed was useless, I wouldn’t be able to sleep. Instead I decided to go to the forest. I walked to the bench that is at the open space with my favorite tree. It wasn’t cold and the sky was clear. I sat on the bench and just looked at the stars. After a while I channeled some material for myself (nothing new, just that I shouldn’t be so hard on myself and cut myself some slack from time to time) but I don’t know where\whom that was coming from. Could as well be myself. I lied down on the bench for a while and went home to sleep. It was now 01:15.
When I woke up this morning I felt funny; I felt strong emotion in my heart area that I interpreted as longing, but I wasn’t really identified with it. It was just there and I kept my attention on it and let it flow because it had a healing quality to it. I tried to keep my heart open by doing nothing with it. It seemed to flow between my heart, solar plexus and stomach. It just kept going and eventually I had to get up to do my morning meditation. The feeling subsided somewhat but returned during the meditation. A scene suddenly popped up in my head and I saw soil before me covered with leaves from the trees. I was kneeled and on my lap rested the head and shoulders of a person who was dead. I think it was a female and she was dressed like a house maiden would be in the 1700’s.
The flow of emotion felt like grief now. I let it flow and observed while something of a storyline developed. She had made a mistake in the past and had now sacrificed herself to make up for that, but since I loved her the sacrifice caused me great pain. As I sat there holding her I started to give her (and me in the scene) shamballa, light and love and intended to forgive her. I don’t know if it was sufficient but there was a lot of light. The flow has not stopped yet and continues while I write this.
I Just did a Light meditation and it was unusually strong. Visualization of the light was vivid and my body was tingling. My heart center felt warm. Maybe it was because I read this small book yesterday by St.Germain. I have another book by him coming in today. (The book made me wonder about the act of thinking, is it really necessary to think thoughts in order to function? I’ve been trying to stay aware of breath during the day and diminish thinking to see how that would work.) After the meditation I remained seated for a while and mind became quite still. A thought stream developed in my head that was interesting. It seemed like a message. They were just like my own thoughts but at the same time they were different. I decided to let the stream continue; normally I would withdraw my attention from thoughts and return to the meditation object . I wasn’t recording or anything so I had to recap afterwards what was said:
Sandalphon/Eliyah spoke to the Light workers on the planet . How deeply grateful the beings of Light are for all the work that has been done and how important this time is. It is time to support the beings around us in their choice; to listen to fear of change and want to go back to the old or listen to the inner being and welcome the new. He said ‘support’ because the principle of free will cannot be violated, one can only support the beings in their choice. The Light beings thank us from the depth of their cosmic heart and encourage us to continue the work.
That was the core of the message and all I can reproduce now. I was reluctant to share this because I always doubt myself but decided to do it anyway.
This excerpt from ‘Journey of your Soul’ is interesting because it describes exactly what I’m doing. I’m just experimenting, trying to get my fantasy going until it gets a life of it’s own and then I see what I get.
I also see what has been blocking me in the past. For one I adopted the habit in meditation of dropping every thought as an unwelcome distraction, without evaluating it’s contents. This blocks any channeling because as far as I understand now, it is the enitity’s thoughts that pop up in your mind and translating them to words is still the channel’s job it seems. Also I do a lot of visualisations. Maintaining a visual image before my mind’s eye also blocks fantasy and leaves no room for spontaneous input. So what I do now is to meditate for some time to quiet the mind and body and then try to channel by just starting some dialog out loud and seeing what happens.