I maintain a playlist on Spotify that I often use to meditate, get relaxed or during concentration work. I decided to turn it into a collaborative list so that anyone can add songs and see what happens. So , you are invited to share!
Be well !
(in case the above doesn’t work for you : use this link .)
I would like to recommend the book Anatomy of Desire by Gina Lake. It’s a profoundly deep read and a book that -as many books- seems to come at the right time for me. Also , unlike other books on non-duality she includes the concepts of a higher self and other entities which I find helpful.
Nobody, or: Awakeness identifying itself as a dream character everyone has learned to refer to as ‘Dennis’.
In this post I’ll share some moments of a totally normal day in the life of a totally normal person. Why? Because I feel like it.
I get up at 6:45 after hitting ‘snooze’ a bunch of times. My wife has already gone working. The ‘kids’ aren`t home too, so I’m alone in the house. Well, except for two dogs, two rabbits and three chickens. I make myself the usual glass of fresh orange juice to provide the body with energy for the morning activities. First I meditate for 20-30 minutes. Since I’m alone in the house I sit in the living room on the sofa.
The theme of the meditation varies. I’ve done Light meditations exclusively for quite a while but lately I’m reserving time for other things too. Today the theme was investigating emotions. After that I go up the stairs and do some upper body excercises to keep my back and shoulders supple since that’s a weak spot. Otherwise this body is serving me very well until now and I am quite content with it. Then I get on the crosstrainer and work out for about 20 minutes. Time for a quick shower.
Before shower – sweaty 😋
After shower – no sweaty 😎
After that I make myself some breakfast. Usually a cheese sandwich and a peanut butter sandwich. Some crystal water to wash it down.
A cup of coffee. I know it’s not good for me but hey, you only live ~2000 times. I take my breakfast and get on my way to Work, which means walking aaaaallll the way to the dining room where my PC is. I’ve been working from home since March now and this will continue at least until September. Working from home is okay but not exclusively, so I try to go to Maastricht at least once a week on Wednesday. That way I get to see a few colleagues and ride my bicycle. So I crawl behind my desk with my breakfast and get to work.
It’s extremely busy at work. We were still recovering from the hack in december when corona came along and turned everything upside down. Working at home makes it worse because there is no feeling for things or supporting contact with colleagues so you become your own enemy if you don’t cope with that pressure well. I think I’m doing reasonably well most of the time.
Lunchtime! Made myself a pancake… mash a banana and mix with two eggs. Add a few spoons of oatmeal and some cinnamon. Mix it up and bake slowly in a frying pan so the oatmeal has time to cook. I added some apple slices in this case, too. A bit of apple syrup on the top and violà. Again a glass of crystal water to wash it down.
After that I did a short meditation in the shade of the (huge) hazelnut bush and off we go back to work. Yay….
Halfway the afternoon I went to check if the chickens had layed any eggs. They had:
The green egg is from a race called Araucana, I think it’s very cool. Other than the green shell, these eggs are normal.
Around 5pm the work day ended and my wife came home with my son whom she had picked up; he had been staying over with a group of friends for a week to party. Somehow he managed to get his bag in the wrong place and now all his clothes are in a van en route to Rotterdam 🙄 sigh…
So we had dinner together and in the evening I had a shamballa night. We chat, do healings and draw cards. A few of my favorite group members called in sick which was disappointing, but at the same time it made me more relaxed and gave me room to focus more on other stuff. I drew an interesting card:
I also got a few other cards that were spot-on. We performed a group healing for Mother Earth which felt strong, and finally we formed couples and healed each other. During the group healing I felt the energy was strong and alive, but during the personal healing I had to trust the process because I didn’t feel very inspired. The other person liked it though.
At home I felt charged-up as happens many times after shamballa and I knew I wouldn’t be able to sleep. Instead of staring at the ceiling in bed I decided to walk into the woods. I like it there in the dark. I recently saw a spot where two giant trees that almost touch each other at the ground grow away from each other in a v-shape. I put on some old clothes and walked over there. I sat down cross legged between the two trees with my back against one of them, it was quite comfortable. I started to meditate but noticed I couldn’t focus on the breath so I focused on sensations instead. Some rodent was rustling through the leaves right next to me. The sound of the wind in the trees. The feeling of my back against this huge tree. It gave me tingles, but as a meditation it wasn’t much. After 15 minutes or so word got around that I was sitting there and I was turning into a mosquito landing strip. I didn’t fancy that so I slowly walked home again.
Now I was tired so I went to bed. In hindsight maybe this wasn’t an ordinary day after all, if there is such a thing.
‘Temet nosce’ means ‘Know Thyself’. Learning who you are is the greatest journey anyone can take in this existence. Not only to get to see your True Nature, but also to understand your inner workings so you can lead a more skillful life.
Usually learning takes place using a punish/reward system. Unfortunately for us humans, we tend to need suffering to incentivise us to learn. The vehicle for that suffering (and the rewards) are our emotions. Emotions can bring us great suffering if left under the care of an unchecked mind.
The first step to coping with difficult emotions is taking control of the mind factor. This is difficult but it can be done with practice. If done well like here (Dutch site) it can result in profound spiritual growth.
That’s why I always see two sides to difficult emotions. I see and feel the pain and the suffering is there, but I also see the opportunity to grow. The emotions are going to be there anyway, might as well use them and learn. This sounds easy but it is not. It takes courage to not flee into the victim role, blaming the world and avoiding responsibility. I admire anyone who has the guts to consciously confront their emotions.
That being said, strong ‘positive’ emotions are not necessarily good too. If the pendulum swings far to one side, the next swing will be to the other side. It is best to stay close to the middle where there is balance. I think this is one of the lessons of Life.
Yesterday my partner and me visited Centrum Elize for an energetic massage. We found this through an ad on Social Deal. It sparked our interest and we went to try it. We loved it. Els is a lovely empathic woman and she takes her time with her clients. We booked two subsequent 75-minute sessions but she took all morning. I connected with two friendly cows outside and enjoyed a walk along the canal while my partner lay on the table. While she performs her massage she also works with energy and interprets the signals from the body. She will start a personal dialog with you if you want to. It was a special experience and is highly recommended.
I’ve been on the lookout for a teacher for quite a while now. My problem was however to find one that is established , trustworthy , accessible, preferably male and affordable too. That’s a lot to ask. Yesterday I was looking at Fred Davis’ website and there was a post that there were openings in his student program. This program has been full the last few years so immediately I jumped at the opportunity. I was admitted and for the coming two months I’ll be attending a weekly Satsang (group session via Zoom) and a monthly hour of 1:1 with Fred.
It’s been a while since I posted anything about myself here. That’s because I’ve been very busy and focused on the awakening course by Fred Davis I was attending. It disrupted my daily routine and what’s more, work was very busy and I also had a lot of practical stuff to figure out like where to go on holiday since our flights to Thailand had been cancelled. During this time I had all these practical problems to solve and simultaneously tried to focus on the awakening course. My meditation routine was disrupted too. This created a mess in my head which prevented me from being clear enough to write anything useful here. It still is very messy in my head. A lot of dust still needs to settle.
The course by Fred Davis consisted of an awakening session on Saturday June 13th, followed a clarity session on the subsequent two Saturdays. The awakening session was essentially a neti neti session but with a twist. Fred attacked the adopted identity of a Dennis. The Dennis with his name, history, opinions,traumas,desires etc. You come to see that these things are all just thoughts in your head and have no real reality to them. Also , since we identify with the body , Fred goes ahead and goes on a structured search in the body. Where is this Dennis located? It’s nowhere to be found! It worked well and I could feel that I identified much less with the body and the concept of ‘Dennis’, but identification with thoughts remained strong. What’s more, I didn’t experience a radical shift like I did at a party about a year ago. I knew I’d be trying to re-create that experience and I know ‘Dennis’ can’t do it because I know – from reason and experience – that ‘Dennis’ does not exist. Experiences happen but they have no owner. Still there was a big sense of disappointment after the awakening session because ‘I’ hadn’t woken up. It has taken me a few weeks to get over that.
I’m very grateful I had the opportunity to participate in this course. I (un)learned a great deal. I did not wake up but several others in the course clearly did which is amazing. The course was recorded and the video will be available for renting after next weekend, so if you want to see me ‘fail’ you can rent that video.😉 I’ll post a link when it’s available.
I highly recommend this course. It really has the potential to wake people up, I’ve seen it happen! An equally good recommendation is the audiobook ‘Awaken Now!’ by Fred Davis, which is a transcript of a one-on-one awakening session as he does with clients. The book can be accessed here for free if you start a trial month of Audible. It’s total length is about three and a half hours. I listened to all of it in an extended meditation and I found it *really* good. I can imagine it wakes people up and makes them realize their true nature, I’m just a tough cookie. But the course and this audiobook both shook my foundation so I’m keeping at it.
To finish this post here is a quote from Fred Davis:
Truth #1: we make stuff up in our heads. Truth #2: we believe the stuff we make up. Truth #3: we suffer because we believe the stuff we make up. Truth #4: we go on a spiritual path because we suffer from believing the stuff we made up.