I’m still dealing with a lot of fear from different sources and it seems it all can be traced back to a central fear of being ‘not good enough’. I’m afraid of the upcoming healing ceremony because I might fail or disappoint myself. The feeling of being unworthy or ‘ not good enough’ is very strong lately. At first I was thrilled and happy to be invited to participate in that ceremony but now there is mostly fear and that fear blocks my energy and my confidence so I feel weak, further strengthening the feeling of inadequacy. This also caused the anger in my previous post. However, withdrawing from that ceremony is not an option for me; that would be real failure in my eyes. I have to learn to let go and trust that it’ll work out.
I started practicing EFT (emotional freedom techniques) , also called ‘tapping’, to address this fear.
The basics are easy to learn and application takes only a few minutes per day. It’s based on restoring energy flow through meridians, thereby releasing blocking emotions or beliefs. I’ve done a few sessions so far and it seems I feel instantly more relaxed but this is only temporary, the fear is getting stronger during the day. But, as with many therapies it may get worse before it gets better so I’m keeping this up.